by The love always has to be unconditional. Where there is love there are no conditions. If there are conditions, then its just a transaction and may be a convenient one. It can be a good arrangement and many people have made excellent arrangements in life and are happy. However, it would not fulfill you or transport to another dimension. Its simply convenience and not bliss.
When you react to circumstances around you, then your actions are external as per the situation. Whatever is done externally is based on multiple conditions. However, love is internal and how you are internally definitely can be unconditional. There is a reason its called falling in love. You have to take the fall, you have to sacrifice some part of you for the sake of love. Its because the other is more important than yourself. Love is not convenient. If you are the strong one in the relation, then its just convenience and not love.
Expectations
Where there are expectations, there is no love. Love is where you never count what you give but always remember the smallest things you get. The minute when you have thoughts like “I am doing too much for this relation” it starts to fall apart.
Fragile
Love is fragile. It does not mean its not beautiful. A flower is fragile but its beautiful. It takes time and effort to grow one but an instant to destroy it. However, love should not be the foundation of life. It has to be hard work and skills you have in life. Isn’t it wonderful to enjoy the beauty of flower after a hectic day ?
True Love
So what is true love. When most people talk love, they are imagining the emotional side of things. Emotions change daily, however is the true love supposed to change daily? If you are having a bad day, you might not feel the emotions but does that mean its not true love? If you gauge the love with emotions, all it would get you is the pain. But is love supposed to bring pain ? Does it not supposed to make us blissful?
If you are seeking blissfulness through love, then it becomes a transaction where you are in for benefits. So, learn to be blissful and love would follow. If you are blissful, then you would be loving in nature and love everything around you. You would be free from seeking something out from your relationships and actions. You would then be free from the burden of managing the transactions.
How to be blissful
Actually everyone is born blissful. This is the reason kids are happier than adults. Kids love small things in life like enjoying splashing water or following a spider or drawing something completely meaningless with a chalk. As we grow, we are taught whats valuable and whats not. How to invest time valuably which generates profit or benefits. This takes away blissfulness where we stop enjoying or loving everything around us. It makes us selective where we believe only this thing or person can make us happy.
Try an experiment, start noticing something (may be a tree or a mini fountain) which is of no value to you today for 15-20 mins everyday for a month. After few days you would develop love and emotions towards it. That tree or fountain would not love you back, and would not even notice your love but you would still feel the pain if that tree is cut or fountain breaks.
I hope you would understand that you don’t have to be blissful, this is the way you are. All you need to do is discover it in your own way.
